The only way is up!

img_4307I feel like a butterfly.

That butterfly may be experiencing nasty headaches but I still feel like a butterfly; emerging all shiny and new.

The last year has been less than happy both in health and ‘life direction’ (which are, unsurprisingly, closely linked), which has meant that I’ve not been feeling up to posting here.  I’ve started many posts with half formed ideas but not been able to develop them into anything coherent.  I have struggled with my energy levels, I picked up my worst viral infection in many years at the end of January and ended up really quite poorly for a few months, complicated by side effects from a new antidepressant, and haven’t really been the same since.

coyote-under-anvil-300x234The last month, and the last two weeks in particular, have been especially challenging because I’ve been experiencing horribly painful headaches (hitting about an 8, possibly a 9 at times) with no apparent trigger.  I often think that pain is easier to deal with as you can disassociate yourself from it to a certain degree.  Not so much with head pain, it is too ‘close’.  They are non-typical of most headaches, but they are not what this post is about.

What this post IS about is that, over the last handful of days, I have really noticed that my energy is returning.  I’m still feeling tired from dealing with the pain when my headaches are bad but it is different to the crushing-can’t-do-a-thing fatigue typical of CFS.  What’s more, that energy feels sustainable.  It does not feel like a guilty ‘boom’ period waiting for the ‘bust’ that is typical of the cyclic nature of CFS.  I’m feeling stronger, I’m feeling fitter and I’m feeling like I might just be able to climb out from the chrysalis of the last year.  I’ll even go so far as to say that the energy I’m feeling now feels more sustainable than when I was at my fittest post-diagnosis in early 2014; then I still felt like I was balancing on a knife edge and might just fall off.  This energy feels more abundant.

I’ll still have to be mindful that I don’t go too-far-too-fast and come crashing down.  But…this might just be it.  It might just be the start of something amazing; it might be the start of my reclaiming my body, my fitness and my life.

What has brought about this change?…. Juice Plus+

I know.  I was a sceptic too.  What has changed to make me a) try it and b) love it?

a)  A friend of mine posted some superb ‘before’ and ‘during’ pics of her Juice Plus journey and what really got me interested was the change to her, and her daughter’s, health.  Their results were fantastic but, more than that, it was the simple change that made a huge impact on their lifestyle.

b) I have since tried the premium fruit & veg capsules and a week and a half later, I’m feeling so much better than I have for a long time.  I’ve not been able to take the dog out for a walk (more than my ‘baseline’ minimum) for weeks, and even then I could only walk once or twice a week because the walks were just on the limit of what I could do without precipitating a setback.  I’ve struggled to drag myself out of bed.  I’ve not wanted to turn on my computer and I’ve struggled to settle to reading a book because I couldn’t concentrate.

Today, I have turned on my desktop computer in the cabin for the first time in weeks (having previously only turned on my laptop for urgent things needing to be done) I woke up fairly ‘bright’ this morning and have taken the dog for a walk today after two previous 7k step days (without any post-exertional malaise).  I’m still feeling awake at 5.30pm whereas I’d previously be wilting.  The change has been simple: a handful of fruit & veg capsules in the morning in place of previous multivitamins or supplements which never really felt like they gave me any benefit.  (Edit: it’s now 5 to 7 and I’ve just cooked a quick supper and put the animals to bed.  Still going strong).

It is still early days and nobody can predict the future but this feels like the start of something new, something wonderful: health, fitness and FUN!


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