External Stresses / The Pain of Waiting

This interminable waiting is soul destroying.

I am trying to sort out my “exit” from work and it is so slow.  If they know it’s going to take a longer time to respond then the least they could do is let me know, to “manage expectations”.

The upshot of this is that every time I check my emails I’m not sure if I’ll hear something from them, I’m half fearful that I will have something as the previous responses from work have been problematic; every time my phone goes there is that same uncertainty until I see who it is.  Then there is the disappointment when I haven’t heard anything, that I’m still in limbo, that I can’t go any further to improve my condition.

It is so difficult to move forward.  They say with stress that you don’t know how badly something affects you until the weight of carrying it has been lifted.  However, I know that I have a huge weight of stress that I’m carrying, I just don’t know for how long or for how far and it is exhausting.  I look forward to the day when it’s all over and done with because then I can start to move forward, I can leave this chapter of my life behind me and be able to concentrate more on my recovery.

Anyway, I just needed to get this off my chest and now I’ll be back to trying to distract myself from the wait.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s